#95 - DDB

I have the utmost respect for mothers of handicapped children.  They are so tough.  #95 is one of the toughest.  Her daughter was born with a rare condition that has affected all of the muscles in her body.  The result is that she has a daughter who is mentally fine.  Extremely smart and clever, in fact.  A child with a body that doesn't support her.  Her daughter cannot walk, crawl, or roll over.  She cannot breath on her own.  She cannot get in and out of her wheelchair without the help of one or two other people.  She cannot hold her head up without support.  I could go on and on.  This child is the youngest of three children and her two brothers are also a handful with learning disabilities in school and behavior problems, most likely the result of trying to wrestle attention away from their fragile, medically unstable sister.

I know a lot of people who could not handle this.  I know no one who would want to handle this.  But... you know the saying, "God does not give you more that he thinks that you can handle."?  I know this is true, because the moms that he picks to take care of these kids are made of tough stuff.  There are days that this mom just crys.  Locks herself in her bathroom (once everything is taken care of and everyone is stable for the moment) and just bawls.  But them, she blows her nose, dries her eyes, and gets back to doing what she must.  Take care of her child.  Often times without help.  To make matters worse, her husband was diagnosed with cancer and needed extensive treatment which required him to take a medical retirement.  Now, not only does she have three children to take care of, she has a sick husband to care for, and no income.  Sure, she has the sympathy of her parents and siblings, but really on a day to day basis...it is her.  Just to give you a very small idea of what I am talking about.  In a one hour session of physical therapy, we may have to suction out her daughter's lungs 3-4 times because she is turning blue from lack of oxygen.  To put it into perspective for you non-medical readers...this means that if we did not suction out her lungs, she would die.  This is a worry for me for the hour that the child is in therapy.  It is a worry for her mom, 24/7.  No breaks.  No time-outs.  To top it off, because this child is so smart and wants as normal of a life as possible, this mom has enrolled her child in a regular school, and goes with her everyday and sits in the back of the classroom.  She stays out of the way, until she hears the alarms go off on her daughter's ventilator that means her daughter needs her stat.  She does this not because it is easy, but because it makes her daughter happy.

I know my writing cannot possibly explain exactly this situation, but I will tell you what this has taught me in the many years that I have treated this child...

Count my many blessings including my healthy children...Say an extra prayer for this family often...I hope I am learning the lesson that I think God is trying to teach me, which is, Do not complain because there are so many people whose lives are so much harder than mine and whose challenges are a million times more daunting.  I hope that if God ever has to teach me a lesson from this book, I have some of the backbone that he put into this mom.