#312 - Mr.WC

When my boys were smaller, the older two wanted to take Tae Kwon Do.  They both expressed an interest, but to be honest, Jeff and I both were kind of hesitant.  But...it was in between all the other sports...it was near our house...and it was exercise... so we decided to check it out.

We went to the local TKD place and met the owner (aka #312).  He impressed us from the start with his insistence on manners including "Yes Sirs," standing up straight, making the boys answer the questions that were asked of them, and insisting that they look him in the eye when they talked to him.  Despite this, neither Jeff nor I had ever had any experience with martial arts of any kind before, so we were real hesitant to sign the 2 year contract on the dotted line.  Mr. C anticipated our hesitation and offered two free weeks of classes to make up our minds.

From the start, the boys loved it.  I will say this for TKD...they have the marketing stuff totally together.  Here are the plus and minus take home points according to moi.

Positives:
+  Great exercise
+  Makes them use their memory to learn the forms
+  Lots of positive reinforcement as they "test" and move up a belt color regularly.

Negatives:

-  Expensive...I could live with the monthly fee.  The boys could go to class
2-3x/week, but then you get the add-ons like "testing" fees, they need the summer shirt, they need all the sparring gear, they need the TKD bag to hold the sparring gear.   Then as they progress, they get talked into tournaments which is another fee.  We drew the line despite the pleading of our boys to let them buy and take the special, "only if you are good enough" swords class.  Sigh...really???  Swords???

-  Takes itself a little too seriously.  This is really why #312 makes my post.  Let me explain.

I was having a really rough day.  My grandfather was dying and my grandmother was taking care of him at home.  While the boys went to class, I would usually try to go and spend about an hour at my grandparent's house to help however I could.  On one particular day, I spent some time at their house, and then went back to the studio to watch the last 30 minutes of class.  Jeff was out of town on business and I had a two year old Seth with me.  The studio had a viewing area with a plexiglass partition that separated you from the class, but it did not extend all the way to the ceiling, so noise was not filtered.  Well, after about 15 minutes of sitting on my lap, my two year old decided he wanted to get down.  He started doing a little running, a little playing, and a little talking.  Nothing really bad, but kinda loud I guess.  Anyway, #312 (who was about 6'2" and completely bald) comes to the door of the room and says in a very loud and harsh voice, "ARE WE BOTHERING YOU?"  He then shut the door very forcefully.  He scared Seth to death.  Seth ran to me crying and crawled up on my lap.  I couldn't help it.  He started to cry and I started to cry.  It was just one of those days and having the TKD teacher yell at me when I was trying to keep my child as quiet as possible was the straw that broke the camel's back.  I seriously considered pulling my two kids out of class and walking out, but I really didn't want to make more of a scene, so I just waited until the end of class and then left. 

Once I got home, I started thinking and thinking and thinking about what had happened.  I mean really?  Who did that guy think he was?  You are preaching and preaching about not being a bully...being respectful of others...using manners etc.  Then you are going to use your size to bully a child and his mother?  Needless to say,  I got myself all worked up and was still very upset later that night after getting the kids to bed and finally relaxing in my tub.  That's when Jeff called to check in and find out how our afternoon went.  All he had to do was ask, and the floodgates opened.  I cried and told him the whole story.  He was upset also, and we hung up now really knowing how to handle it.  Or so I thought...

A few minutes later, I was still in the tub, when the phone rang again.  I figured it was Jeff, calling again to make sure I was okay.  But guess who was on the other end?  #312! 

"Hello?"  I said tentatively.
"Ms. MHT?" he asked.  "This is Mr. WC.  I wanted to call and apologize for this afternoon.  I was having a bad day and I let my frustration get the best of me.  I took it out on you and your son and as soon as I saw your face, I realized that I was out of line.  I wanted to call to apologize."
A little shocked, but very appreciative of the phone call, I told him that he had upset me and it had bothered me all afternoon.  I thanked him for taking the time to call and we hung up.

I immediately called Jeff back and told him about the phone call.  He said, "Good, that makes me feel better," and I agreed.

The next night, Jeff was home, and after we put the kids to bed, we started to talk about it again.
"I can't believe he called!  He must have really seen how upset I was," I said.
Jeff looked at me with a little grin on his face.
"What?' I asked.
He wouldn't say.
"What?" I asked again.
Finally he fessed up, "I called him as soon as I hung up the phone with you and ripped him a new one.  I told him exactly how I felt about him bullying my wife and child." (and a few other choice words)  He went on the say that #312 had no idea that the situation upset me so much, but he was very apologetic once he heard what Jeff was saying.

I was honestly shocked.  It's not that I didn't think that Jeff had my back, because I know that he does, but it just really caught me off-guard.  On one hand, I am pretty independent and can usually stick up for myself, and on the other hand, I don't get into too many fights.  But I will say, it felt really really good to have my husband act so swiftly in my behalf for a situation that upset me.  It didn't matter that if I wasn't so tired, if I wasn't so sad about my grandpa, and if it probably wasn't that time of the month...I probably would have shook it off.  All that mattered is that it upset me.  My hero! 

I hate to make #312 sound so bad, because maybe he did just have a bad day.  The next time we went to class, he made it a point to find Seth, get down on one knee, and apologize to both of us again.  It wasn't long after that, that TKD became a whole lot less important in our house.  The boys made it through the forms and Zack got his red belt and Blake got his black belt.  This was a great accomplishment for both of them.  When I think back however about TKD, it is not the belts that I remember...it is the story that I just told you.  When my husband slayed my dragon without me asking or expecting it.  Thank you babe!